After meeting this girl through a mutual friend one night we hugged, exchanged numbers, and I called her a few days later to hang out. {She was quite toned and skinny with cantaloupes in her bra… after the hug it was clearly confirmed that they were indeed implants} We went on a few innocent little dates. Unsure if I was really interested I hesitated on messing around at all until maybe the 3rd date or so. She seemed fun, had a good sense of humor, and had a job… a bonus in this world right now.

She had invited me over to her place that night. We ordered Chinese food and started watching a movie. Quite clearly we both had a bit of pent up sexual feelings towards each other and started making out on the couch. After some hard core kissing and deep & hard hip grinding… we were both definitely interested in more.

I got her sweater off, next came the tank top with only her cute smile and bra staring me in the face. My hands had been all over them so I reached around and unhooked the bra with one snap of my left hand. I was on top of her at this point and as I slipped the bra off she stopped the kissing and bluntly stated (not whispering): “Just so you know… They-re not real!”

If only I could have done a Zack Morris “Time Out” to skip her from saying this all would have been well.

My mind did not know how to respond to such a awkward comment so I responded saying… “um…. ok-ayy.”

The comment running through my head was an erection killer… it totally ruined the excitement of the moment. A million things started going through my mind… clearly she was insecure about them? Did she actually think I did not know they were implants? They were hard as rocks and did not move an inch! Not to mention they were not exactly proportioned to her body size.

All of this killed the moment and we paused to talk about it for a few minutes. I learned that they were a gift from her ex-fiance and they ended up a bit larger than she had initially wanted. Too Much Information for such a casual and innocent encounter. We were just messing around a bit. It was supposed to be new & exciting.

When it is clearly obvious… How is a guy supposed to handle this situation. It was no big deal to me…

MK