Grass is greener. People that are taken are always more desirable, right? If they were available, my bet they’d be less attractive to you. It’s weird, but that’s how it works.
It’s totally true! When someone isn’t available you idealize why they are the perfect match for you. But if you actually had them, you might change your mind. Once I stopped dating a guy b/c he liked me too much too fast. Then I heard he was dating someone else, which made me second guess my decision. So just to see if I could get him back, I went out with him again. Then he liked me again and then I ended it again. I am not bitchy when I date, but in my younger years I have some cold hearted moments.
SO this begs the question. You like someone. You don’t want to play games so you just go with the flow. BUT if you make yourself unavailable would that change the game? I usually just put myself out there and don’t play games. But surprise, it hasn’t worked!
If they do come around you might just get to know them better and realize the connection is not there. When they are unattainable, their story hasn’t unfolded yet and you want to know it. You want to unravel the mystery.
Yeah game playing is an easy way to get yourself hurt ultimately in the end, you can try as hard as you want to find a reason why he isn’t as interested as you are but pretty much the sooner you let go of whatever you wish you had the better!
I heard this quote this morning that i think works well:
” Everyone that i was supposed to hook up with, I have never hooked up with. And everyone I never was supposed to hook up with, i have always hooked up with”-Timmy the Grizzly
Cheeky brings up a very Buddhist philosophy in the giving up of our desires. If we do not want, we do not wan.
Try treating every new person you encounter like two simultaneous auditions for a partner in crime rather than an intimate partner and you might see yourself worrying less about the sexual tension or finding the right word to label the connection you’re experiencing with a person.
Just to play devil’s advocate, an alternative response:
Fantasizing about what you cannot have is very human and actually very healthy. It gives you the opportunity to play out different life options in a safe way. However, tempting as it may be, do not let those fantasies overrule the reality that life shows us at times, or else you will end up feeling miserable and worthless at your own hands.
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You figure if someone else wants them and stays with them they got to be worth the time and commitment
Grass is greener. People that are taken are always more desirable, right? If they were available, my bet they’d be less attractive to you. It’s weird, but that’s how it works.
It’s totally true! When someone isn’t available you idealize why they are the perfect match for you. But if you actually had them, you might change your mind. Once I stopped dating a guy b/c he liked me too much too fast. Then I heard he was dating someone else, which made me second guess my decision. So just to see if I could get him back, I went out with him again. Then he liked me again and then I ended it again. I am not bitchy when I date, but in my younger years I have some cold hearted moments.
SO this begs the question. You like someone. You don’t want to play games so you just go with the flow. BUT if you make yourself unavailable would that change the game? I usually just put myself out there and don’t play games. But surprise, it hasn’t worked!
If they do come around you might just get to know them better and realize the connection is not there. When they are unattainable, their story hasn’t unfolded yet and you want to know it. You want to unravel the mystery.
Yeah game playing is an easy way to get yourself hurt ultimately in the end, you can try as hard as you want to find a reason why he isn’t as interested as you are but pretty much the sooner you let go of whatever you wish you had the better!
I heard this quote this morning that i think works well:
” Everyone that i was supposed to hook up with, I have never hooked up with. And everyone I never was supposed to hook up with, i have always hooked up with”-Timmy the Grizzly
Cheeky brings up a very Buddhist philosophy in the giving up of our desires. If we do not want, we do not wan.
Try treating every new person you encounter like two simultaneous auditions for a partner in crime rather than an intimate partner and you might see yourself worrying less about the sexual tension or finding the right word to label the connection you’re experiencing with a person.
Just to play devil’s advocate, an alternative response:
“Where there’s a will there’s a way?”
Fantasizing about what you cannot have is very human and actually very healthy. It gives you the opportunity to play out different life options in a safe way. However, tempting as it may be, do not let those fantasies overrule the reality that life shows us at times, or else you will end up feeling miserable and worthless at your own hands.
It’s lot simpler than anything anyone has posted. The good ones are always taken because they are good.